Living La Vida Alpo

I hope you dance...

If you don't already subscribe to the Big Picture, get your lazy ass over there and do it now, you naughty elf.

Last week they posted two heartbreaking series of photos from Tehran (here and here). 

Now they're going the uplifting route, chronicling dancers all over the world.  Beautiful.  Serendipitous timing, too.  We need it.  And check out #19.  Bittersweet. 

This one's #3 in the series, from Belarus.  One of my faves, if only because they look so carefree.

When Google Ads Go oh So Right

The google ads that accompany the gmail conversations I've been having with one friend lately have been especially hilarious. 

Where else can you find ads for lawnmowers and "love chairs" *wink wink nudge nudge* in the same place?

But one day a text ad came up that read "feminism for kids." 

Like, hello?  Custom-designed for QueenAlpo, yo!  So of course I clicked.  What?  I couldn't help it.  I read that thing and suddenly some switch flipped in my newly-installed motherboard (hi, D!) and my finger was moving on its own.

And I fell in love.

Seriously, if I could, I'd get this on a T-shirt.  Too bad all I wear lately are work shirts and pumps.  The dress code at work is pretty flexible, but methinks this wouldn't fly.

Tab Dump

With absolutely no method behind the madness. 

Deal with it, elves.  Mwah:

• L-word creators break their silence in this fascinating interview.  I'm in love with these brains.  Someday I'll join their club and... create something too.
• Obsessed with this blog by Sara on the way your brain sorts out its info.  I wonder if I'll ever be able to make sense of the world via ranges of dizziness, which is pretty much what I'm experiencing now.
• The fact that this link will take you to Oprah's webpage is NOT a sign of my capitulation, I promise.  Rather, it's a sign of how much I'm in love with Ayelet Waldman (aka Michael Chabon's writer wife).  Her so-called controversy: that she puts her husband at the center of her life, not her children.  I have a bone to pick with her about that, but hey, at least she shook things up, right?
• If you don't already subscribe to Sharon Pajka-West's feed, go, run, click NOW.  She always seems to have the in-info on new deaf books or deaf characters.  Now, this posting she has up on Lance Allred's memoir is kinda irritating me.  I've recently fallen out of love with the memoir in general, especially in the ways publishers market them.  Look!  Mormon!  And raised a polygamist!  Oh!  And he's *gasp* deaf!  And... wait for it... oh, no... he struggles with OCD.   In essence, the memoir marketing game seems to be about how many "oh no, the poor thing" factors you can slap on a book jacket.  Whatever happened to good, accessible, relatable writing!?

My new role model.

Check it.

It's called parenting in real life.

Sometimes response blogs are the best ones.  Case in point... anna today responds to Penelope Trunk: What if You're Not a Good Mom, But Nobody Wants to be the One to Tell you?

A gem that applies to parents of all genders:

"...[B]eing a mother is fraught with choices about how to best parent your child, and that everybody has an opinion, and that there are no easy choices anymore. I would not call it wisdom, but I would call it developing a familiarity with the concept of things not always being able to go according to plan. Letting go of some control. Accepting that you will have to do things, sometimes, that you thought only a bad parent would do, before you were a parent yourself."

But I do have other things I'd like to rip out...

I'm hearing things -- well, not really hearing but... BWAHAHA I made a funny! -- about last night's House episode, which I missed.

I have no clue what the storyline is other than some deaf teen got a cochlear implant against his will courtesy of the very courteous Dr. House... I got bored three words into this recap, but the general gist of the things I'm hearing?

• One, that the teenager who got implanted got it activated the very next day.  Wow. Magic. 
• Then he was able to understand the things he was hearing within minutes.  Fuck magical.  This is miraculous.  (Has anybody ever seen At First Sight?  Val Kilmer, Mira Sorvino?  Blind guy gets some procedure done to his eyes, but can't make hide nor hair of what he's seeing 'cause he's never seen before.  Hello, logic!)
• And I don't know how this comes about, and I don't really want to, but apparently later he gets upset and he rips the freaking thing out of his own head.  Agh.  Gory.

I'm not gonna comment on the ridiculousness of a show I've yet to see when my buddy Nabeel (a fellow cuer who's about to start his own CI journey) has already done it for me, other than that it'd be nice to hear about a deaf story in TV these days that doesn't have the CI at its' center, 'cause talking about CI's all day long?  Hello, ennui. 

I am gonna say, however, that I'm pretty freakin' happy I didn't think to watch it last night -- I usually watch it every week.  Coincidence? I think not.  My night was pretty dang blissful, thank you, without having a freakin' TV show piss me off, and that in itself was a gift from the gods. Hello, divine intervention!

Funny Boy Redux

Not too long ago I was introduced to the intricacies of the violent conflict in Sri Lanka between the majority Sinhalese and the minority Tamil -- or, rather, by factions within those two ethnic groups -- when I read Funny Boy, an archly poignant novel about a boy who grows up gay amidst this political turmoil. 

The Big Picture brought that book back to life for me with the photo essay posted today.  That place is gorgeous, its culture and people fascinating, and it makes me so sad to see this happening there.

This undated picture released on April 25, 2009 by pro-LTTE website Tamilnet shows civilians taking cover after what they say is an explosion caused by a goverment airstrike in the no-fire zone in Mullaitivu district. UN humanitarian chief John Holmes was to hold talks with the Sri Lankan government over the thousands of civilians caught in fighting between troops and Tamil rebels, officials said.The Sri Lankan government has resisted all calls to halt an offensive that is now on the brink of wiping out the Liberation Tigers of Tamil Eelam (LTTE) rebels, who have been fighting for an independent Tamil homeland since 1972. (AFP/Getty Images)

O, to be a Brit chick...

... 'cause they're kickass.

Not only are they the first ones to get a "female vasectomy," (*gasps* I want! I want!) they're also so tough that when one husband shoots his wife in the head before shooting himself, she survives and makes a fucking cup of tea when the cops come (Earl Gray, two lumps, thanks).

The entire United Kingdom and I are gonna have one hot date someday, yo.

*EDIT:  It's just been brought to this lamebrained blogger's attention that the woman in the tea story is actually an American (Thanks, Tate), even if the story is from a British publication.  Here's where actually paying attention would have come in handy.  Alas... I'm still drooling over the Brits, so stuff it.

Chewbacca's Relay Terp, perhaps?

Dooce blogged yesterday about overhearing an angry call via a relay operator.

the caller ... viciously shouted things like, "NO! NO! NO!" and "SUE! SUE! SUE!" and even threw in a growl for good measure.

I'm betting this was via a VIDEO relay operator.  Uh-huh.  Yeah.  'Cause you know what?  I'm in love with my text-based relay services just because I can't stand using my VP, and yet, I can't see myself typing in:  "Please growl at this receptionist."

But via ASL?  Oh, yeah.  Growls and shouts?  Totally translatable.  Woocha!

Woof-cha shoutout

Recently, America's Dog Whisperer, Mark German, came to town and hosted several different workshops.  Mom invited me, but me being the snooty oldest kid I am with my own shit and my own life, I ignored her invitation.

Her being the awesome Momsie she is, she ignored my snub and got me a book of his autographed anyway.  Today when she was over at my house she said casually, "Oh, did you see his website?"

Noooo... and I don't care...

Well, lickety split, she shoved my ass upstairs to the office and made me pull the website up and click on the "Testimonials" page.  She pointed at a picture of some butt-ugly black dog named Shadow.  Woop-de-doo.

Then I scrolled down and suddenly peed on my keyboard.

It's my favorite Aunt Joyce out of Phoenix!! There's even a pic of her on there.  Woo-hoo!  The first time I see my aunt in 12 years, and it's online. 

Boy, I may be a terrible daughter, but I'm an even suckier niece.  But, but, but BUUUTT... I'm a stoked sucky niece, yo.