Screwed.

They shouldn't call that Essure procedure-thingy a surgery. 

Surgery implies blood and owies and anesthesia and stitches or staples and time off from work.

This was a couple of woo-woo pills and ten minutes in the stirrups and "No, I feel juuuuust fine, doctor -- BWAHAHA!" and a chauffeured drive home.

Best of all, insurance covered every last penny.  Even the co-pay.  Which is nice, finally seeing an insurance company doing something smart, as opposed to stories I've heard about companies not covering birth control for college students, but being more than happy to cover a Viagra prescription.  (Unintended pregnancies in young adults versus some geezer having a hard time with his hard-on?  C'mon.  No-boner-brainer.)

And when they told me I'd be able to see my fallopian tubes on a TV screen, I asked, "Can I bring my camera?"  And then I giggled. 

It seemed like an appropriate thing to do -- giggle, that is -- when you're asking a wacko question about things inside your body.  And you're not sure if this doctor-person is one of those people who believe things inside the body should stay inside the body.

The doctor didn't even blink. She shrugged, said, "I don't care.  Y'know... You might not be up to it 'cause I'm gonna give you some of the good stuff, but whatever.  I can take pictures for you with the telescope if you want."

THAT DOCTOR IS A GODDESS.

And so, without further ado: my fallopian tubes, screwed.

The right tube, partially obscured by tissue.

The left tube, freshly corkscrewed. Over the next three months, scar tissue will form a natural and impenetrable barrier around the metal, thus rendering me sterile and free from the pill. 

Backing away from the insert in the left tube.  *Cue angelic choir*

 
 

Comments

[Adrienne]

Is that the internal view of the cervix in the last shot too?

And COOL! I once had a gyno exam where the doc let me watch the exam on a television screen while she had the camera down there - this was in Brasil though.

[www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=15613953]

That is so, SO COOL!!!!

[QueenAlpo]

Adrienne -- LOVE that you're asking. LOVE even more that someone wouldn't mind looking at my cervix with me. :-D But alas, no. It's just some leftover bloody patch somewhere in my uterus in front of the fallopian opening.

[Kim @ Beautiful Wreck]

Awesome pics!